Growing Pains

Sorry for such a long and in many ways inexcusable delay since my last post, but I have been trying to find the timing for my next attack. No matter what style I practice, I've always been a counter fighter at heart. Life being the most evasive and elusive opponent can make my counter attacks that much more unpredictable. In this particular season, I'm forced to observe and refine while I map out my strategy for a long awaited objective.

The recent year and a half has been Xing Yi season. Learning the energy and strategies of Xing Yi has been a daily chore that can be both pleasant and very irritating. Although continually practicing Xing Yi directly enhances my Bagua, just as Taichi and many of the others styles that are on my plate. Yet I feel that Xing Yi is really just not my cup of tea. I don't believe that it is any less effective than Bagua, or I should say I don't feel any style is less effective than any style. Everything in life is just a matter of whether you understand it, or more importantly find some form of joy in it. I do enjoy practicing Xing Yi..just not as much as I enjoy running through the Bagua meadows and forests of endless changes and possibilities. If I have a problem, Bagua is always there to help me clean it up. I love Bagua so much that I literally practice it in my sleep. But like I said...it's Xing Yi season. Which means that Xing Yi is going to be taking a chunk of my Bagua time.

God has always tied together the seasons of my training and my life directly. When I was looking for my martial arts style, I was also looking for my place in the world. Recently I was blessed with an idea that was so astounding, that it has been hard for me to sit still. At every waking moment, this idea grows and expands unto the point that I sometimes get goosebumps or become watery-eyed that I could even be associated with it. It's probably the same feeling that Edison had before he invented the light bulb. Though I take steps to make sure this future objective continues to grow and develop, it is still not yet the season for this idea.

In fact I spend my hours at a desk in a cubical just slightly smaller than a jail cell. And before I can even invent the "new light bulb" I must first translate hundreds of newspaper articles from Chinese into English. I've been a rapper, actor, screen play writer, dance instructor, editor, and so on. I never thought that I would be the guy, sitting at the desk for 9 hours a day.

To many this would seem like a conflict of interest or somehow a step in the wrong direction. But this jail cell of an office was at one time a prayer request. I said, "Jesus help me find a job so that I can take care of my new born baby." The way I got the job was nothing less than miraculous. Even though there are days that I am almost completely overwhelmed with articles, I remember how I beat a hundred people to get this job. Even on the worst days, this small little cubical is a blessing.

In reality I know this job is not something that I want, but it is something that I need. Not only do I need it for my financial situation, but also to help me finish the creation of my light bulb..just the same as Xing Yi. My Bagua Spirit is one that feels like fire and I am ready to burn away at any opportunity that will let me utilize my arts. But a spirit of fire needs to have the ability to be cool, and a spirit of ice needs to know how to burn. God knows exactly what you are meant to do, but He needs you to experience both sides of your power. By translating newspapers I am learning all the Chinese that I didn't know that I didn't know. I would feel comfortable talking with the President of China about the space program. Also my writing skills have developed in areas that are more professional and will undoubtedly be the perfect weapon for my tool box. Not to mention that translating newspapers for the university also teaches me how to run a university.

Before Moses became a powerful figure and freed the slaves from Egypt, he was cleaning sheep poop for someone else's herd. God says do not despise small beginnings and that is where my Xing yi and my career are today. This is the beautiful beginning of learning about power that I didn't know I needed. Sometimes the one thing you think is stopping you is helping you and the one thing you think is helping you, is stopping you. Be humble enough to absorb all of the nutrients for your current situation because you will benefit from every challenge that you accept. If you refuse your circumstances then you are doomed to encounter similar events until you learn what is needed. Once you are at peace with a challenge in your life it means that you have outgrown it.